I love my community. Dare I add a “duh”? There is a reason I applied for a reporter job with my community’s newspaper in 2021, despite already having a mountain of commitments and responsibilities as a local educator and mental health counsellor. The open position felt like an opportunity to connect with North Dundas, which I would be stupid to pass up. More than 3 years later, I don’t regret my decision at all.
It is often said that those who take far too negative of an approach would “catch more flies with honey than vinegar”. This is true! The benefits of positivity and optimism cannot be overstated, particularly in the world we currently live in. However, there are cases when vinegar is more fitting than honey. Sometimes it seems like vinegar is taboo in North Dundas.
What I mean to say, in less cryptic terms, is that in a tight-knit place like North Dundas, us residents take our lives into our hands when we dare speak about something we don’t like in our community. It’s as though anything that isn’t “fluffy talk” must be banned. Admitting that our amazing community isn’t perfect – since nothing is perfect – seems to be a crime of the highest order, punishable by ostracization.
I was born in Winchester, and grew up in North Stormont. Even as a young child, I was obsessed with the Winchester area, and I can remember telling my mom while I was still elementary school aged that I was going to live in Winchester when I grew up. When I got a job as an educator in Winchester in 2016, the opportunity to live out my “destiny” and move a short walking distance to work was all too tempting. It took a couple of years to find a place, but that’s one “impulse” I’m glad I followed!
And then, I almost messed it up. I was settled into my Winchester apartment and so very happy to be officially part of the community I loved so much. But I grew up in a place where recyclables were collected bi-weekly at the road in mixed containers. This was back when – in North Dundas – recycling was also bi-weekly, but the containers and cardboard still had to be separated. One week, when I put the recycling at the curb, I put the cardboard bin down with the containers bin over top. I then flattened a large box and put it on the containers bin at the top of the stack. My recycling load was rejected for “mixed” recyclables. I was annoyed, because I had taken the time to research the local rules, and meticulously separated containers and recyclables.
In a moment that I have since regarded as pure stupidity, I took to the local Facebook page. I don’t remember exactly what I wrote, but it was just honest feelings. I knew at the time that the Boyne Road Landfill was over capacity. I knew that, as a person who generated very little garbage, I could easily just stuff all my recyclables into a large garbage bag and still be within my 2-bag limit the following week (don’t worry, I didn’t). I was upset that what I thought was an obvious flat piece of cardboard on top of my containers bin was considered mixed with my containers bin.
It was less than an hour before I had to take the post down. I was absolutely ostracized, ridiculed, and shamed for complaining about the local garbage collection. It seemed like everyone took it personally, as though I struck a nerve you simply can’t touch. How dare I? To my memory, I wasn’t even complaining, I was just asking how strict the workers are, and how best to guarantee everything gets picked up in the future. At points, the comments got personal. I learned a lot that day, primarily about how to “fit in” to my community and not be seen as an outsider. Yes, there are imperfect things in North Dundas, but we don’t talk about them. The first rule of fight club is that you don’t talk about fight club.
Why is this coming out now, many years later? Because I believe that a healthy community needs honesty, not just rainbows and fluffy stuff. When the railway crossing on St. Lawrence Street in Winchester was being repaired on August 7, twice I accidentally went that way and had to make a u-turn because there was no signage on the highway. Yes, there was signage pre-posted close to the crossing, but like most people, my brain isn’t firing on all cylinders early in the morning on the way to work, and it certainly isn’t thinking “oh yes, it’s August 7, I must detour”.
I noticed a social media post from someone with a similar concern – why let people turn into a busy through-road into town only to have them do a u-turn half a kilometre later? She was ridiculed and told that there were signs posted days in advance. Yes… not in the best location though. My own experience the second time I had to turn around was that the crossing was still marked with “road closed” signs on my commute to work on the morning of August 8, even though the Township had posted the previous evening that the work was complete. I’m not asking for anyone to be shamed, but a blunder is a blunder. Can I at least mention it without being torn apart?
What actually inspired these musings was the simple fact that… well… I’m afraid to say it… the railway crossing at St. Lawrence Street is still anything but smooth! I know these crews are under a lot of pressure, and no, I couldn’t have done a better job myself, but isn’t honesty the best policy? Shouldn’t we be able to say “yep, the crossing was repaired but they didn’t do the best job this time around” without being worried about the first rule of fight club?
I love my community and I’m all about strong community pride, but open discussions matter too. Instead of trying to make pickles with a jar of honey, let’s stop being afraid of vinegar.